Cowan huddle.

The Taco Tour stop at El Cid in Logan Square provided a lot of superlatives. Most people in my posse at a stop (6). Youngest posse member at a stop (3). Oldest posse member at a stop (41). First stop with somebody I’m related to (my sister, brother-in-law and two nephews). Hottest salsa on the tour, so far (salsa caliente – nothing crazy, but pretty darned hot).

I’ve been to El Cid many times, including the old, original location (sniffle) which is now a Rum bar called Paladar (same ownership). It’s a great place for quality Mexican food, created by Cubans, with a price to match the smaller taco stands. BUT…how are the tacos?

They’re actually very good. I tried the carne asada, which they call flank steak on the menu. This is also the first stop on the menu where I had to translate from English to Spanish. The spices and grill flavor are right on. I also enjoyed the al pastor, which they call Mexican gyros. It has a nice adobo flavor and has just the right amount of pineapple to balance out the flavor. The carnitas was my final taco, and although it wasn’t a home run, it wasn’t as dry as most places. We’ll call it an infield single. You know, good, but not that good.

Also, if any single guys would like to rent my 3-year old nephew and take him there, he’s available for $3,000 an hour. He’s a super cute kid with curly hair that looks like Sideshow Bob’s. Every girl in the restaurant came over and complimented him. Just sayin’.

The (insert superlative) details:

• Location:  2645 N. Kedzie Ave., Chicago, IL (Logan Square)
• Tourists:  Josh, Julia, Heather, Darin, Carter, Conn0r
• Tacos sampled:  carne asada, al pastor, carnitas (also have pollo, barbacoa, lengua, chorizo, picadillo, lengua, vegetariano)
  
• Toppings:   onions and cilantro, lime
• Salsa:  pico de gallo, salsa verde, salsa roja, salsa caliente
  
• Extras:   chips
• Tortillas:  corn
• Atmosphere:  large, outside, inside, upstairs, downstairs, Cuban-Mexican
  
• Price:  $1.95/taco
  
• OVERALL RATING: 8.0
  

That white car struck me just after taking this photo, breaking my leg in three spots. All in the name of tacos.

Carnicerias Guanajuato is the second grocery store taco spot on the tour. I’ve seen these stores in a few spots in the city, but didn’t know about their tacos until I did some research. After seeing them come up on list after list of the best taco places in Chicago, I decided to give ’em a try.

The first thing I noticed was how crowded it is in the the little taco corner of the grocery store. The second thing I noticed was that I was the only Blanco in the place. I got to the front of the line, gave them my order and waited. I’m just going to say this was a mere coincidence, but the seven Spanish-speaking people behind me got their tacos before I did. They must’ve wanted to make mine extra carefully.

On a side note, if you ever go there, be attentive to when your order is coming up, especially if you are a Gringo. The guy that yells out the orders that are ready speaks in Spanish, and talks at a speed that would make the Micro Machines guy jealous.

I first tried their carne asada taco. It’s very tasty – juicy, nice grill flavor, good tortillas. It’s very basic, but done right. Then I tried the cecina, which they called a Mexican beef jerky. It’s definitely not like the beef jerky  I’m used to. In fact, it tastes just like the carne asada taco, just with a different, less juicy cut of meat. It’s a good tasting taco, but not what I expected. Finally, I tried the carnitas. Most carnitas tend to be on the dry side, but this one is not. It too has great flavor. I’ll take these grocery store tacos any day.

Try to pick out the “beef jerky”…

Here’s the dealyo:

• Location:  3140 N. California Ave., Chicago, IL (Avondale)
• Tourists:  Josh
• Tacos sampled:  carne asada, cecina, carnitas (also have lengua, lomo y cebolla, and chorizo)
  
• Toppings:  onions and cilantro, lime
• Salsa:  salsa verde
  
• Extras:  nada con nada
• Tortillas:  corn
• Atmosphere:  grocery store, blanco-free, busy, gringo-free, metal bar stools
  
• Price:  $1.99/taco
  
• OVERALL RATING:  8.0
  

Dreamy Eyes.

Chicken Run Campeche is located on Milwaukee in Logan Square on a block with many taco choices. The restaurant prides itself on its pollo and mariscos. BUT, they do have tacos, so I went with my childhood little league baseball rival Justin to check it out (he was on the Orioles, I was on the Tigers….we totally destroyed them).

First thing I noticed: we were the only ones there. Usually not a great sign. The only other person to come in was a homeless guy that came in to use the bathroom, ask us for money, and tell Justin that he had dreamy eyes (all 100% true). Justin’s not available, so he didn’t take the bait.

Tacos. Right. Obviously, I had to try the pollo tacos. The chicken is cut up in chunks, which is much better than the shred up chicken strings most places serve. They are still a little dry, though. The chicken has pretty good flavor, and with enough of the chunky, sweet, spicy, smoky salsa rojo they serve, the taco is pretty good. The carne asada tacos are good as well. They are seasoned and cooked well, but I could have used a little more onions and cilantro (I AM a taco diva). The chile relleno taco was also pretty good, as long as you don’t mind a bit of a mess. It’s pretty spicy and cheesy and overflows like a fat girl in skinny jeans.

For a place that doesn’t emphasize their tacos, and for a forgotten spot on Taco Avenue, this place holds up pretty well.

The deets:

• Location:  2339 N. Milwaukee Ave., Chicago, IL (Logan Square)
• Tourists:  Josh, Justin
• Tacos sampled:  carne asada, pollo, chile relleno (also have al pastor, vegetariano and chorizo)
• Toppings:  onions and cilantro
• Salsa:  salsa roja (chunky, smoky, sweet)
  
• Extras:  chips
  
• Tortillas:  corn
  
• Atmosphere:  empty, good seating, empty, nice people, empty
  
• Price: $1.85-$2.50/taco
  
• OVERALL RATING: 7.5
  

A man, coming out of his cage, to eat Las Asadas.

I have a friend named Billy who lived in the Lazo’s parking lot. Actually, he lived in an apartment in a building adjacent to Lazo’s parking lot. That would be weird if he just lived in the parking lot. Whenever people talk about Lazo’s vs Arturo’s he says that Las Asadas, about a quarter block to the north, is superior to both. So what did I do? I went on down to check it out with my ol’ friend….Justin.

Billy’s right. Las Asadas is better than both. The carne asada taco is one of the best (I was going to say amazing, but that word is way too overused on my block). It rivals La Pasadita any day. The meat is very tender and grilled perfectly. They load up the tacos with meat and onions and cilantro.

I also had a chile relleno (first one on the tour, whoot!). It was huge, spicy, extra cheesy and very tasty (the taco). If I was a hippy vegetarian, I’d have this erryday.

My third taco was a picadillo. It sorta resembled Taco Bell, but was a little more salty. I’ll let you choose if that’s good or bad…

They have a salsa negro that needs to be mentioned. It’s spicy and smoky and very tasty. Ok, it’s been mentioned.

Da breakdown:

• Location:  2045 N. Western Ave., Chicago, IL (Bucktown)
• Tourists:  Josh, Justin
• Tacos sampled:  carne asada, picadillo, chile relleno (also have pollo, lengua, vegetariano, barbacoa)
  
• Toppings:  onions and cilantro
  
• Salsa:  salsa verde and salsa negra
  
• Extras:  nada
  
• Tortillas:  corn
  
• Atmosphere:  small, busy, order at counter, authentico
  
• Price:  $2.05-$3.50/taco
  
• OVERALL RATING: 8.5
  

I didn’t know there were Spanish abbreviations. Huh.

Where do I take my princess on a wonderful, romantic, sunny Saturday afternoon in the greatest city in the world? Tio Luis Tacos in Brighton Park, of course.

Until two weeks ago, I had never heard of Tio Luis. After doing some research on the best tacos in Chicago (it comes up on virtually every list), boy is my face red. This place is great.

First, let’s start with the ancillaries. Tio Luis has some great pickled veggies (including jicama) waiting on your table. They also provide you with chips and four kinds of salsa:  a salsa rojo, a salsa verde, a smoked chunky salsa, and a spicy cilantro salsa. All of them are delicioso. Their tacos come in a regular (6″) and small (4.5″) sizes. This makes it great for idiot taco bloggers to try as many as possible.

I liked all of the tacos I tried, which was five out of their seven. Even the small tacos have a lot of meat and they pile on the onions and cilantro. I especially liked the chorizo, which had a good amount of salt. The carne asada was juicy and tender, with great grill flavor. The pollo was made out of chunks of chicken breast, so it was not dry, stringy shreds of sawdust like most other places.

The lengua taco was really good, but be advised, unlike other places, you can tell this is a tongue you’re eating. You can see the smooth side of the tongue and little taste buds on top. My princess was not in the mood for the tongue.

Here’s the deal:

• Location:  3856 S. Archer Ave., Chicago, IL (Brighton Park)
• Tourists:  Josh, Julia
• Tacos sampled:  carne asada, pollo, al pastor, chorizo, lengua (also have tripe, and chile relleno)
  
• Toppings:  onions, cilantro and lime
• Salsa: salsa roja, salsa verde, smoked salsa, cilantro salsa
  
• Extras:  chips, picked vegetables
• Tortillas: corn – 4 1/2″ or 6 “
• Atmosphere:  authentic, good amount of seating, neat, nice servers (which, of course, also means they aren’t hot)
  
• Price:  $1.65-$3.50/taco
  
• OVERALL RATING: 8.5
  

Unfortunately, nobody flashed us their taco.

Here’s the deal. I’ve been to Flash Taco a number of times, but it’s always been in that 2:00 a.m. to 4:00 a.m. range (on Friday and Saturday they are open to 6:00 a.m.) after a long night of being an adult. So, my memory on exactly how it tastes is a little cloudy. Therefore, I decided to take my lil’ gangstress down to Bucktown for some tacos at 1:00 P.M.

The overall feeling I got was a resounding “ehhhhh.?.?.” They aren’t that great…but they aren’t that bad either. All of them were a little bit dry and lacked that zing you want to feel from eating “Mexican” food. But, there weren’t any glaring issues.

The asada was supposed to be seasoned in some sort of adobo sauce, but I couldn’t sense it. The suadero (brisket) claims to be grilled to perfection, but I don’t think a B-performance is perfect. The cochinita pibil (slow-roasted pork) was also marinated in a “special sauce”. It too was incredibly, extremely average.

Let’s not drag this on, this place is aight…

Even this picture is really mediocre.

The particulars:

• Location:  1570 N. Damen Ave., Chicago, IL (Bucktown)
• Tourists:  Josh, Julia
• Tacos sampled:  asada adobada, cochinita pibil, suadero (also have barbacoa, carnitas, chicharron, lengua, al pastor and aguacate; they also serve white-boy tacos with lettuce and cheese on top that come in steak, chicken, chorizo, ground beef, veggie and chile relleno)
  
• Toppings:   onions, cilantro
• Salsa:  salsa verde, salsa roja-ish
  
• Extras:  pickled vegetables
• Tortillas:  corn (flour and hard shell also available on the white boy tacos)
• Atmosphere:  small, drunk, eclectic crowd, order at counter
  
• Price: $2.25-$2.50/taco
  
• OVERALL RATING:  6

La Nueva.

La Pasadita. La Pasadita. La Pasadia. That’s what goes through hundreds of peoples’ heads every day driving down Ashland Avenue. La Pasadita has three locations, all within 75 feet of each other.

The original (La Chaquita – “the small one”) is on the east side of the street (1141). Across the street from that at 1140 is El Largo (“the long one”, ladies) and directly south of that is La Nueva (“the new one”) at 1132. You can read about how all of this happened here. It’s a really great read, but one that my friend Justin and I hadn’t read before going. We chose La Nueva, which coincidentally the article says is the one for white people. My friend Justin, yup, that Justin, says it’s the best one and is the only one that has the salsa negro. If that’s not true, blame him.

La Pasadita is known for their “steak” tacos, so I decided to try all three that fit into that category. First, I tried the carne asada. It rivals some of the best. The steak has a great grill flavor and is seasoned with some family recipe rub that whoops booty. The barbacoa is excellent as well. It tastes like a beef roast. The lomo (ribeye) is very good as well. No grill flavor, but enough fat and seasoning to do the trick.

The only negative I can think of is it’s a lil’ dirty in there….but dirt don’t hurt.

Cow. Cow. And, Cow.

The salsa negro is also very tasty…smoky, sweet, spicy.

Stats:

• Location:  1132 N. Ashland Ave., Chicago, IL (Wicker Park)
  
• Tourists:  Josh, Justin
  

  Las Pasaditas.

• Tacos sampled:  carne asada, barbacoa, lomo (they also have pollo, lengua, chorizo, and chile relleno)
  
• Toppings:  onions and cilantro
  
• Salsa:  salsa verde, salsa negra (roasted tomatillo)
  
• Extras:  chips
  
• Tortillas:  corn
  
• Atmosphere:  lil’ dirty, small
  
• Price: $1.85-$2.50/taco
  
• OVERALL RATING: 8.5
  

The main event.

Let’s face it, when you’re faced with what place to go at 3:00 in morning on Saturday night, it’s not “Artur’s or Lazo’s”. For most people, it’s “Arturo’s vs Lazo’s”. So…

When I ordered, I tried to get as close to the same thing that I did at Arturo’s. At Arturo’s, I had the carne asada, carnitas and camaron. Lazo’s doesn’t have a camaron, so I got a carne asade, carnitas, and pescado.

While the carnitas at Lazo’s is still on the dry side, it’s nothing like their counterpart’s next door (it sucks all of the moisture out of your mouth, like that thingy at the dentist). The carne asada was much better than Arturo’s. The meat was juicier, and had a little more grill flavor. The pescado was similar to the camaron at Artur’s. The fish had a nice taste, but the taco didn’t bring anything else to the party.

Winner: Lazo’s

This half-moon tomato slice and lettuce thing is more widely used than I thought.

Break it down for me fellas:

• Location:  2009 N. Western Ave., Chicago, IL (Bucktown)
• Tourists:  Josh, Glen
  

  Glen stole that truck, then picked up some homeless kids and took them to the circus…is that wrong?

• Tacos sampled:  carne asada, carnitas, pescado (also have picadillo, pollo, chorizo, frijoles, al pastor, vegetariano, barbacoa, lengua, chile relleno, and lomo)
  
• Toppings:  onions and cilantro or lettuce and tomato and lime
  
• Salsa: salsa roja (lil’ chunky) and salsa verde
  
• Extras:  chips
  
• Tortillas:  corn
  
• Atmosphere:  lots of seating, 24 hours, quick to serve, slow to bill
  
• Price: $1.95-$2.95/taco
  
• OVERALL RATING: 7
  

Antique Taco is one of these new gastro taco places the kids are all hopped up about. I have a couple nit-picky negatives, but overall these tacos are fantastic.

I like to be able to mix and match my taco order so I can try as much of the menu as possible. Antique tacos come two per order and cannot be mixed and matched. The price is a little much, albeit the tacos themselves are quite large. Also, we experienced a bit of a wait after ordering.

Ok, enough Negative Nancy. These tacos are really good. First, I had the grilled ribeye. The meat is seasoned well (a bit salty, but that’s how I like) and has a nice grilled flavor. They don’t skimp on the meat, either. The toppings for all of the tacos are made to match the meat. Although there are some toppings that don’t stand out (heirloom salsa, queso enchilado), the cilantro and onion are a nice compliment. The fish tacos are great too. Again, they have huge chunks of meat. The cabbage and Sriracha tartar sauce are nice additions (I couldn’t taste the scallions) to balance out the texture and flavor.

P.S. – try the horchata milkshake!

Purty.

French Vanilla, gimme the scoup:

• Location:  1360 N. Milwaukee Ave., Chicago, IL (Wicker Park)
• Tourists:  Josh, Julia
• Tacos sampled: grilled ribeye, crispy fish (also have sweet and spicy chicken, market mushroom and pork carnitas)
• Toppings:  various (all 5 have their own toppings), lime
• Salsa:  salsa verde (thicker and darker than most)
  
• Extras:  none
• Tortillas:  corn (homemade)
• Atmosphere:  antiques, hipsters, seat yourself, order at counter, soft rock
  
• Price: $7-$8/two tacos
  
• OVERALL RATING: 8.5
  

Terrible photo of Arturo’s.

Last night I took the ol’ lady out for a big night on the town. For our formal dinner, we tried Arturo’s in the first of our two-part series: “24 Hour Taco Joints on the Corner of Western and Armitage”. I know I’ve tried both Arturo’s and Lazo’s several times, but I was unsure of who had the better taco. After last night, while 2/3 of my tacos were tasty, I’m guessing/hoping that Lazo’s will come out on top. Arturo’s was less than spectacular.

The carnitas taco was possibly the driest thing I’ve ever eaten. Leather would be envious. The chunks of pork were large and looked hopeful, but any excitement was lost in the first bite. Enough, I have cotton mouth just typing about it.

The carne asada and camaron tacos were both good, but not great. The shrimp tasted pretty good, but there wasn’t anything else on the taco with taste. Some cabbage, a remoulade, or anything with taste or texture would have been a nice compliment. The carne asada was good and cooked well, but lacked grill flavor.

Ok, on to Lazo’s….

Suspect #1 in the middle…

The breakdown of our visit:

• Location: 2001 N. Western Ave., Chicago, IL (Bucktown)
• Tourists:  Josh, Julia
• Tacos sampled:  carne asada, carnitas, camaron (also have chorizo, lengua, pollo, al pastor, vegetariano, cabeza, barbacoa, aquacate, suadero, tripas and chile relleno)
• Toppings: onions and cilantro or lettuce and tomato
• Salsa:  pico de gallo, salsa roja
  
• Extras:  chips
  
• Tortillas:  corn (camaron had flour)
  
• Atmosphere:  busy, hipsters, mexican diner, 24 hours, servers watching you like you’re an exhibit at the museum
  
• Price:  $2.05-$2.95/taco
  
• OVERALL RATING:  6